CisterSpeak

An Iconic Loss

When I first heard the News that Michael had passed, I was in my car driving home from work.  The entire drive home I'm frantically switching between the stations hearing different reports as I raced home to turn on the news.  When I finally got the devastating confirmation that he was gone, I just sat staring at the television, shocked, wishing the news marquee would switch back to saying "hospitalized" instead of "dies."

The world has lost one of the most talented people to ever live.  Michael was a true legendary icon and will live on forever through his music and the profound impact he left in the music and entertainment industry.  He paved the way for many of our artists today and for that I am grateful.  I just realized too late the great sacrifice it was to him.  Fame and idolization of the magnitude he had, came at a very high price and we will never truly know the cost of it.  I felt so remorseful that I'd gotten caught up in recent events and how he'd changed; and never really thinking much about, or, of him in recent years. I was so focused on who he became rather that who he was....Until yesterday when his death took me back to the 80's, to Michael I remembered and loved.

I am so  lucky to have lived in an era and time in which I saw Michael at his greatest.  I clearly remember my brother and I glued to the TV whenever one of his concerts or videos aired; and afterwards we would race to the kitchen in our footsie pj's and do our best attempt at moon walking across the floor.  My parents would look at us smiling as our little feet couldn't quite get it right, but we laughed, danced and sang, bonding as a family through his music.  We would be singing "Beat It" at the top of our lungs or sleeping with the light on because we scared our selves silly watching the "Thriller" video.    He will be missed.

My heartfelt prayers go out to his family and friends.

You truly never know what you have until its gone.  Rest in Peace Michael...

I Heart Hollywood Project - Interview

We've all heard the 'rags to riches' stories of some of Hollywood's elite.  They were once poor and on a whim they went to LA where they landed an acting gig and their lives have never been the same since.  But if it were all that simple, we'd all be loading our cars or booking one way flights to Cali.  If you've ever wondered what it's like to try to make your way up in Hollywood, then you may want to check out The I Heart Hollywood Project.

IHHP was created by Mashari Laila Bain and Ci Ci Foster, to document the lives of real life actresses.  We were lucky enough to have them reach out to our viewers and explain exactly what the project is all about.

CS: For those of us who are new to I Heart Hollywood, what exactly is the I Heart Hollywood Project?

(MASHARI) IHH is a feature length documentary focusing on the lives of working actresses in Hollywood.
(CI CI)  It really gives the viewers a bird's eye view to what it's really like in this industry when you're climbing to the top. All the women are from various Ethnic backgrounds and we all share a sheer determination to be successful in the industry.  We are also doing a 2010 calendar showcasing the women from the documentary. All the images were shot by Jody Domingue. We're giving all the proceeds to a non profit organization, Hollywood Heart, who provide direct services to at-risk youth, and children affected by HIV/AIDS.  

CS: After visiting your website we learned that the project follows 14 women through their endeavors of being young working actresses that have not (as your site states) reached the "celebrity" status.  Can you tell us a bit more about the project?

(MASHARI) The primary focus of this documentary is to dispel myths of the "typical" Hollywood actress.  The media often portrays actresses as irresponsible, money hungry, fame driven, skinny to the point of sickly, women whose talent is secondary in a world full of sensationalism.  We want to show that the images in the media are not the reality.  Actresses today are just like everyone else, real women following their life's calling to entertain.

(Ci Ci) We also want to dispel the myth of "overnight success". Granted some have gotten lucky rather quickly, but typically it takes years of hard work, countless rejections, and extreme focus to get that one break out role. It is especially difficult for actresses of color because there aren't as many roles for us.  

CS: How did you choose the women for I. H.H.?

(MASHARI) We had a very extensive selection process.   The others answered a casting call.  We received hundreds of submissions and we quickly weeded out the ones we felt wanted to be "reality stars."  We researched the ladies on google, myspace, facebook, etc.. to see if we could get to know who these girls really were.  Then we called each of them in to an audition and asked them to share "their" story with us..

(Ci Ci) We choose women who had that "It" quality. They are interesting to watch and instantly like-able. We wanted women who we felt an audience could relate to.

CS: When we typically think "actress", success and fortune come to mind.  Most girls and women don't really think about the grueling work that is involved in being an actress.  What defines the "celebrity" status from your typical actress?  

(MASHARI) Quite honestly the media decides who and who won't be a "celebrity."  "Celebrity" in our culture also has a lot to do with the opportunities one has been fortunate to have in their career.  The "typical" actress is someone who is still working on getting that grand opportunity to be recognized for their talent.

(Ci Ci) I think the media has certain actresses they are drawn to. Unfortunately, a lot of times it surrounds something negative in their life, but they make them a celebrity by constantly talking about them. The typical actress is working, but not in the spotlight. She's able to lead a "normal" life. 

 
CS: How old is I.H.H..?

(MASHARI)  We started Pre-production of IHH in May of 2008.

(Ci Ci) And principle photography began June 2008.

CS: With the overwhelming success of reality TV how has I.H.H. adapted to the change?

(Ci Ci) I.H.H is unscripted but our motive is to enlighten, not exploit. Reality TV has taken a portion of work away from working actor's, but feature films are still going strong.

(MASHARI) Reality TV has had a profound effect on the amount of roles available.  Due to the lack of scripted productions there aren't as many shows being produced.  However film is still going strong.  There are also a lot of opportunities for actresses in independent projects such as feature films and television for the web.  

CS: Society seems to have defined success in Hollywood in large opulent mansions, being featured in magazines, having looks to die for and  endless bank accounts.  In a real world perspective how would you define success in Hollywood?

(Ci Ci) To me, success is doing good work that makes you happy. I am successful every time I grow as an actor, producer, or writer.

(MASHARI)  I personally believe that you are the only one who can define success for yourself.  I would define success in Hollywood as someone who is continuing to pursue despite all obstacles.  I would say that as long as you see progress and you are happy living your dream you are successful.

CS: Do you believe there is a happy medium between being a successful actress even if you never carry the "famous" stamp?

(Ci Ci) Yes I do. Some actresses actually prefer to NOT be famous.. They want to lead a "normal life".

(MASHARI)  Absolutely!  Fame is great for those that seek it..  However there are MANY successful working actresses who are never famous.  They continue to do good work and make a living and often get recognized by their fans.

CS: What myths and truths do you feel stand true in the world of acting?

(MASHARI)  Truth...actors are crazy (he-he).  One would have to be a little insane to continuously be rejected for jobs, continue pursuing them, and be happy with their lives.   Myths...well I know for sure all actors are not on drugs, and not every actor wants to be famous.

(Ci Ci) I agree. We must be crazy to constantly get rejected and keep coming back for more. One of the biggest myths are; all actor's are in it for the money. Most of us are actor's because we feel passionate about the craft.

CS: Will there be another documentary in the future and if so what requirements would one need to have in order to be considered?

(Ci Ci) You never know. Right now we have two short films in pre-production. One is a drama about a little girl abused by a family member. The other is a action/drama about female assassin's. We both have individual projects going on as well. I wrote a romance novel "Sunny Rain" which will be in stores this summer. You can find out more by visiting my website http://www.cicifoster.com/ 

(MASHARI)  And I'm working on a web-series called "Going for broke". For more information you can visit the websitewww.goforbroketheseries.com

CS: Thank you so much for taking the time to reach out to our viewers and we look forward from hearing and seeing more of you in the future.  Make sure you check back with us!

If you would like more info, please visit The I Heart Hollywood Site.

To Join...Or Not To Join....

Whether you're a new couple just starting out or a well seasoned veteran team, keeping your finances well balanced is vital to the health of the relationship.  More than likely, you've heard or seen first hand that when allowed, money has the ability to pretty much destroy any relationship beyond recognition.  That being said, I believe that every couple needs to sit down and have completely open and honest discussion of their individual financial situations.  This way both of you have a clear understanding of exactly what you're dealing with.  Although this basically applies it all couples, it should be an absolute mandatory requirement for those just starting out.

Everyone has different reasons, beliefs, fears or opinions in regards to whether or not a couple should have joint or separate bank accounts; there simply is no right or wrong way to approach it.  The only requirement should be that you both talk it over and have SOME type of plan in action.  Failing to address how household finances will be handled going forward is just not an option.

The best thing to do is research the pros and cons of each and decide what works best for your unique situation.  One method that I recommend is having a four account minimum.  This allows each of you to have individual checking accounts, as well as, a joint checking AND savings account.  The joint  checking should be used to pay all shared household expenses i.e.; rent/mortgage, utilities, cable, internet etc.  This is beneficial because it ensures that you're both aware of the household expenses since a certain amount has to be deposited in this account in order to keep a roof over your heads and the lights turned on.  Separate from that, you also have a joint savings account to which you can both make deposits into but it takes two signatures to withdraw from.

Then you still have your individual checking accounts that allows each of you the financial freedom to make your own decisions about handling your own money. This way you are solely responsible for your own account and your spouse doesn't have to worry about the lights being turned off because you just bought a $300 (but hella cute) coach bag.  However, I would still suggest developing a budget so that you know exactly how much you need to put into the accounts that you share.  This combination (if it's setup properly) gives you shared responsibility and transparency in the household finances but sill allows each of you personal freedom in handling your own private finances.  

No matter which method you choose, again, it takes communication.  Even if one person is better at handling money matters then the other; its not an excuse for one partner to just lay back and chill.  You both need to be aware of what's going on.  Whether or not you choose to open a joint account or to keep it all 100% separate is a personal decsion that shouldn't be looked into lightly, there are just too many personal factors involved.  But planning your finances in advance, as opposed to "just letting it happen," has a higher probability of success.  Try different approaches to see which is the best option for you.

Dry, Breaking Nape?

I recieved a few emails on my fotki (pswd is justlovingit) asking me how I grew out my nape area, so here's a little help for the ladies out there who are also struggling with this rough spot.

I have extremely DRY type 4a/4b hair. On top of that my nape area is dryer and much more prone to breakage then the rest.  To cover this up I would put my hair in a low ponytail or simply comb it down (the top was much longer) to cover up the uneven breakage from the public eye.  Of course this did nothing to help it; but at least you couldn't see the damage.  I struggled with this area for YEARS.  Finally I made it my goal to grow this area out so that I would no longer have "see through" hair, and I'm all too happy to say it completely turned around. 

My Regime for my nape:

My saviors were, a moisturizer, right now I'm in love with Karen's Body Beautiful Hair Milk ( I have the Chamomile Sage scent, LOVE IT), Rosewater with vegetable Glycerin( I actually buy this at the local health food store) and Virgin Unrefined Coconut oil.

Every night I spritz  that part my hair (actually I do my whole head, but pay a little more attention to my nape) with the Rosewater and glycerin mix... Not to the point that my hair is dripping wet but just very slightly damp.  Next I take a small (less then a dime shape) amount of the hair milk and apply it to that area and seal it with a dollop of the coconut oil. Finally I do a two strand twist on my nape and pin my hair up for the night.

It seems like a lot, but it's worked for me.

Here was my hair before on March 23, 2007:

(You can see what I meant about 'see through' because you can clearly see my necklace through my severely damaged hair)

and here is that same area as of April 25, 2009:

(In this pic you really can't see straight through my hair to my neck like in the one above; it's thicker and healthier and best of all...no more see through hair!  I may even have that same necklace on as it's a gift from my mom and I very rarely take it off.)

Again, this is a regimine that worked for ME; everything doesn't work for everybody. But I do believe a little TLC in that area goes a VERY long way.

Watch Where You Eat

Two North Carolina Domino's employees were recently fired for posting a nasty video on youtube where one employee put cheese in his nose then on the sandwich, farted on the food, wiped his butt with a dirty sponge and then had the nerve to wash the pan with it!  Domino's has stated that they will be seeking criminal charges against them both. 

In an official statement released by the Domino's  PR team, the employees said that the video was just a prank and that the food was never sent out to customers; (I highly doubt that) and what about the pan that was washed with that sponge??? I am disgusted beyond words and will be thinking twice before eating at certain places.

  "We are shocked, appalled, disgusted and angry about the behavior of these two errant individuals. Their display does not reflect the attitudes and behaviors of 125,000 hard-working men and women across the country and in 60 countries around the world. While they work for an independent - and innocent  franchise owner in North Carolina, we expect their employment to be terminated and we are reviewing our legal options as well."

Domino's Vice President of Communications Tim McIntyre said the franchise owner of the Conover Domino's is innocent.

Source

Summer Cuteness

Looking cute sometimes can be hell on your feet as all sandals are not created equal; but when I saw these in the 'Summer Casual 2009' Victoria's Secret Catalog, I was in love.  They're absolutely adorable and keep it cute but also comfortable.  The neon green and white can be found at Zappo's but the neon pink I was only able to find at Vicky Secrets.

And if you haven't yet gotten a chance to get those toes done, the sandals cover a large part of your feet so you can still manage to look good without a mandatory pedicure needed (but why risk it).  *However* if you have dry cracks on your heels that's a big NONO - There is nothing worse than cracked, ashy, flaky heels in a cute pair of sandals.  I really don't know how some women do it, just the thought has me shaking my head.  Really ladies... a soak in the tub, foot file and vaseline can do wonders...

A Little Natural Goodness

Ingredients: Purified Water, Olive Oil, Aloe Vera, Vegetable Glycerin, Vegetable Wax, Fragrance Oil, Vitamin E & Natural Enzymes

Karen's Body Beautiful Olive Oil Lotion is one of my can't live without beauty favorites.  I have very dry skin that tends to suck up lotion and still have the nerve to be dry and ashy two hours afterwards.  Because of that I tend to favor cocoa butter and sheabutter based lotions which are typically heavier and even those I have to constantly reapply to my arms, elbows and legs (especially if they're exposed in shorts or short-sleeve shirts).  KBB Olive Oil Lotion is the exception.

Very light in consistency it's made of a wonderful Olive Oil base and other natural ingredients.  Application is very smooth and you stay moisturized ALL day.  It is a bit pricey compared to most other store bought lotions at $12; but I find that the cost is justified because I don't need to use quite as much since I don't have to continuously reapply.  The even bigger bonus is that if your lucky enough to visit her shop in Brooklyn, you can see the lotion being made right in the designer kitchen...it's that natural.  Can we say fresh?!  Their customer service both in the store and online is stellar and always on point.

There are several scents to choose from but I personally love the White Tea.  It has a crisp, light smell to it and lasts all day long.  Seriously, you don't even need to wear perfume its that good.  Be aware the fragrance has caused random sniffing by passersby when walking past you; with some women even stopping you to ask what perfume your wearing.  What makes it even better is that she also makes wonderful hair products (yep, we'll be revewing those too) and bath salts and  shower gels,that you can get in the same scent and smell great from head to toe.  When ordering the lotion be sure to click and scroll down to select the scent you want otherwise you will get an unscented version.

Kelly Rowland Leaves Record Label

After parting ways with her long time manager Matthew Knowles late in January, Kelly released a statement Tuesday morning confirming that she has indeed left her record label Columbia records which has been her home as an artist for over 10 years. While she is released from the label as a solo artist, she is stilled tied to it as a member of the group Destiny's child.

 "Because Columbia Records has been my home base as an artist for more than a decade, the decision to move out on my own required a lot of soul-searching," says Kelly.

"As a solo artist, I felt the need to explore new directions, new challenges, and new freedoms outside my comfort zone and my friends and family at Columbia have been incredibly understanding about my evolution. I want to thank everyone at Columbia for the love and support they've shown and I will never forget how many good times we've had over the years."

I certainly think that parting ways Matthew was a great move for her career and hopefully changing record labels also helps bring a little more light onto her new solo endeavors.

Recession Dining: Pei Wei

There is nothing better than good food at decent prices.  One of my top restaurant picks is Pei Wei.  The parent company being P.F. Chang's, Pei Wei's cuisine heavily favors PF Chang's popular dishes (lettuce wraps, mongolian beef etc).  However, the major difference is that Pei Wei is a fast-casual dining experience with an entire menu under $10 bucks.

You walk in and there is a menu on the wall detailing all their dishes.  You pick the entree you would like along with your choice of meat (chicken, beef or shrimp) and your choice of rice (white or brown) or noodle dishes.  For the vegetarians they do have tofu dishes as well.  You also have the choice of dining in or take out.

Once your order is placed your are given a light up buzzer letting you know when your food is done; or if dining in, you place your order, sit and the waitress will bring you your food.  This is great if your running low on time, i.e. out on your lunch break or short for time trying to catch a movie but yet and still want a decent meal.  Eliminated is the long wait for food at a typical restaurant.  The portions are pretty large considering the price so all-in-all its a winner.

My favorite is the mongolian beef with brown rice; which came to a whopping $8.83 instead of $16, needless to say ... I was pretty darn happy.

"Keeping It Real"

Is it me, or has the phrase "keeping it real" taken a turn for the worse?  Has it more-or-less become an automatic ''green light' for people to act ghetto and/or ignorant?  Or, is it really a way for folks to stay true to who they are and their core beliefs and values (that being my initial belief)?  To me, the latter seems to be the better fit.  It almost never fails; lately whenever I hear the phrase someone is either behaving erratically, dressed ridiculously or cussing someone out who they felt was deserving of verbal assault...All in the name of them "keeping it real."

I have to admit that my current "keeping it real" fix is Keyshia Cole's reality TV show.  The first season had Keyshia's mom in jail and then released.  At any given moment Frankie would pop out her false teeth whenever it was convenient for her; other times she was running around cussing out the couple who had the audacity to raise the daughter that she abandoned to a drug habit (go figure).  All the while swearing everything was a "code 10 man down situation!"... I am STILL trying to figure out what the heck that means.

Next is Keyshia's sister Nefeteria.  Neffe has recently confirmed that she is pregnant with her fifth child.  Mind you, just last season she was dealing with anger management issues, a cheating boyfriend, bouts of heaving and crying on the fact that she was planning to abort her fourth child (which she eventually decided to keep), as well as, dealing with abandonment issues with her mother.

And each and every week my sister and I tuned in to watch the drama.  We'd laugh, shake our heads and laugh harder at the crazy and shameful antics of the family.  Finally one night I asked big sis what was it about the show that just kept us watching on a regular?  And of course she said, "It's probably because they keep it real.  This is how they are and it's relatable."

Another show that kept our attention was The Real Housewives of Atlanta.  Nene Leakes was loudest and most outrageous character on the RHOA.  And as a result she was the one most fans liked and considered the most "real."  Until it was revealed later on the news that the house she and her husband lived in was rented and they were behind on payments and in the process of being evicted. And as we all saw with DeShawn Snow being booted off the show because she was quiet and laid back.  Taking care of your business and being classy apparently isn't being "real" enough.

So that leads back to my initial question.  What is the real difference between "keeping it real" and being loud and ignorant?  Can you be real and not be ghetto?  Do you have to have a rough life or situation in order to fit the criteria?  I feel I keep it real everyday when I get up and go to work just to be considered part of the new 'working-poor class' as middle class is rapidly disappearing.  My typical style is to dress to my comfort and taste but its not loud nor do I 'standout out of the crowd.'  However its still very representative of who I truly am.   I don't have kids; and most of my friends and family around my age are married and raising families in the suburbs while trying to make ends meet.   But we're not loud, have great family values and rarely find ourselves having to cuss the mess out of someone.  Of course not all of us fit this criteria but most of us do. We all work hard, sweat blood and tears for our families but at the same time we give and demand respect in return.  Hmmm are we "real" enough?"  And if not, then do I even want to be; how far does "keeping it real" really get you?